How I imagine American football was born
England: And this is football.
*gently kicks ball towards America*
America: You’re not the boss of me.
*picks up ball using hands and bashes into england*
England: And this is football.
*gently kicks ball towards America*
America: You’re not the boss of me.
*picks up ball using hands and bashes into england*
when i first watched orphan black i remember thinking ‘wtf is her accent supposed to be it sounds like some weird english-canadian-irish hybrid’ and then it turned out she was born in england, lived in canada and was raised by an irish woman and thats when i realised the power of tatiana maslany
can everyone plz wish my parents a safe flight tomorrow morning to the isle of man cos my dad’s ban from visiting the island has been lifted finally after 40 all cos he fired a bottle rocket at the queen of england when he was a teenager
since i’ve gotten some intrigued asks here’s the story:
when my dad was 15 he went with his scout troop to a scouting jamboree on the isle of man where he and his friends decided to set off bottle rockets in the park cos idk they were dumb boys. and one of the bottle rockets went careening off into the road where it exploded right beside a car
now, in what year was my dad 15? 1977. the queen of england’s silver jubilee year. and what was the car my dad’s bottle rocket hit? the queen’s car in the cavalcade during her jubilee visit to the isle of man
throw in the fact my dad is irish and the 70s were the height of the troubles between the republic and britain and WHAM BAM THANK YA MAM! my dad got hit with a lifelong ban from ever visiting the isle of man and he and the whole scout troop were sent home
idk who decided to let him off for good behaviour after 40 years but when he got the letter in 2017 saying he could visit the isle of man again after jan 1 2018, my dad burst into the room on my stepmom and i and announced, “WE’RE GOING TO THE CHANNEL ISLANDS!”
shout out to the anon who just messaged me “that means somewhere out in the multiverse there’s a universe where your dad murdered the queen of england” which i’m never posting and just keeping in my inbox forever thank you that’s lovely and yes that’s exactly the response i wanted this to get
just to truly bring this story to complete conclusion my dad just facetimed me from the park where he nearly killed the queen 40 years ago 🌟
Annie on my mind- Nancy Garden
Keeping you a secret- Julie Anne Peters
Leaving L.A.- Kate Christie
Me and you and daisies- Lily R. Mason
The world unseen- Shamim Sarif
Wildthorn- Jane England
Tipping the velvet- Sarah Waters
Dare truth or promise- Paula Boock
And Playing the role of herself- K.E. Lane
Hunter’s Way- Gerri Hill
Ash- Malinda Lo
The price of salt- Patricia Highsmith
Patience & Sarah- Isabel Miller
The Gravity between us- Kristen Zimmer
Her name in the sky- Kelly Quindlen
Taking the long way- Lily R. Mason
Fingersmith- Sarah Waters
when anne boleyn died she was mostly likely in her mid-thrities, and perhaps looked older given the years of stress she lived as queen, she may have had a few greys hair and fine lines on her face
when elizabeth i met her troops at tilbury she was 54 years old, she had bad teeth and thin hair
when eleanor of aquitaine became queen of england she was already 30 years old, when her son richard began king she was 67 and lived some of the most active and adventurous years of her life until her death at 80
when catherine of aragon arrived at her trial at blackfriars and begged henry on hers knees to reconsider and then walked out of court and refused to return she was 43 years old, she was plump and tired looking after years of miscarriages
when her daughter mary raised an army for her right to the throne and entered london she was 37 years old, she was very small and looked much older than her age because of the years of bad health she had endured
anyway women don’t have to be 25 and hot to be important and we should let these women be the ages they were when they did these things
when anne boleyn died she was mostly likely in her mid-thrities, and perhaps looked older given the years of stress she lived as queen, she may have had a few greys hair and fine lines on her face
when elizabeth i met her troops at tilbury she was 54 years old, she had bad teeth and thin hair
when eleanor of aquitaine became queen of england she was already 30 years old, when her son richard began king she was 67 and lived some of the most active and adventurous years of her life until her death at 80
when catherine of aragon arrived at her trial at blackfriars and begged henry on hers knees to reconsider and then walked out of court and refused to return she was 43 years old, she was plump and tired looking after years of miscarriages
when her daughter mary raised an army for her right to the throne and entered london she was 37 years old, she was very small and looked much older than her age because of the years of bad health she had endured
anyway women don’t have to be 25 and hot to be important and we should let these women be the ages they were when they did these things
a fresh “fuck you” to everyone who told me trump administration wouldn’t have negative effects and said we were all overreacting cry-babies
And it ain’t just America, we’re feeling the negative effects all the way down here in Australia too
this is a really good point honestly. i’m californian but i go to school in england and i can definitely see the effects it has there as well. it’s the mindset and ideals that spread to other countries, it’s not just a small american inconvenience
in all seriousness
i think fleur and hermione would spend several years in france
and they wouldn’t move to england until they have kids, and when they do, fleur teaches them perfect french and they’re little wee bilingual children
so whenever the kids want to tell fleur something “secretive” they tell it to her in french
and it isn’t until they’re 10 when hermione just breaks into laughter because they’re whispering french back and forth and she’s just like
“your mother and I spent four years in france, i can understand every word you’re saying”
cue mortified looks from chilren
“she’s the brightest witch of her age” fleur says, sipping her cup of tea
“yeah, sure muman”
and its not until the kids both go to Hogwarts do they hear all the stories about their moms because before they thought their moms were just witches and both were very modest about their past
so the first year they come back for winter break they’re like “mum you get attached by a trOLL?!?!”
and the second year “unCLE HARRY FOUGHT A SNAKE?? YOU WERE PETRIFIED??“
and by the forth year the teachers are like “oh and fleur delacour came from beauxbaton” and the kids are like “we know, we know, mums told us the story of how they met a million times”
until they come back from winter break and is like “Maman yOU FOUGHT A DRAGON???”
when i first watched orphan black i remember thinking ‘wtf is her accent supposed to be it sounds like some weird english-canadian-irish hybrid’ and then it turned out she was born in england, lived in canada and was raised by an irish woman and thats when i realised the power of tatiana maslany
